THE GREAT BEER ROBBERY
THE GREAT BEER ROBBERY!!
So it finally happened. That thing that everyone said would happen because "they'll (whoever 'they' are) take everything that's not bolted down" & "my brothers friends aunts sister got robbed in her sleep" actually happened.
WE WERE ROBBED!
So let me tell you how it all went down...
It started with a few wines (like all good stories do). I must be getting old because whenever I drink now I get this horrible insomnia. So I was awake most of the night staring at the ceiling and wasting time on Facebook. I decided to get up for a midnight snack so I popped outside and opened up the fridge to grab some milk & tim tams (because a healthy midnight snack is no fun at all). I noticed that the fridge wasn't latched, which isn't really that unusual because as Nathan will tell you I often forget to latch it, which annoys him immensely. So I figured it was just me again and didn't think anything of it. Had my snack, re-latched the fridge, went back to bed to stare at the ceiling.
A short while later I heard a slight noise outside and my spidey senses started tingling. So I crept to the window to make sure no one was breaking into the car. Now anyone who lives in a camper or a caravan will tell you that this is something that happens quite regardly - you think you hear a noise outside, convince yourself someone is breaking in, but it turns out it's all in your head. And I couldn't see anyone creeping around the car so I figured this was another one of those times.
Then just as I was finally starting to fall asleep around 2.30 I heard another small noise. Now my spidey senses were going haywire. So I crept to the window again to check the car. I'm looking at the car, can't see anything suspicious over there, when suddenly I realise there is THE SHADOW OF A MAN standing still & silent at the fridge, lid up, with his hand inside!
Well as you can imagine I was rather startled so let out an almighty yell at the top of my lungs politely requesting he vacate the premises (ok, it wasn't polite at all, and was predominantly expletives but you get the gist!)
Well I've never seen someone move so fast! And not just the beer thief - poor old Nathan was fast asleep and I was leaning over him to look out the window so I scared the absolute crap out of both beer thief & husband alike, and woke half the campsite in the process.
We both lept out of bed and jumped outside but old mate Thiefy McBeerface was off like an absolute rocket and long gone after the absolute bollocksing I gave him. A quick check found a nice cold beer still at the top of the fridge so I was feeling pretty proud of myself for saving the day until Nathan pointed out that he'd put three beers in the fridge that evening, thus we were missing two. And on reflection of the evenings events it seems our mate had been visiting throughout the night and helping himself to a nice cold one, one at a time (I mean you don't wanna go to all the effort of nicking a bunch of beer only to have it go warm before you can drink it all!) Which makes me think it may have actually been one of our fellow campers rather than a local thief.
But needless to say after the fright I gave him, I don't think he will be silly enough to visit again (and regardless, we won't be silly enough to have easy access booze available again).
So beer thieves take note: If you come around trying to get my steal my booze in the dark in the middle of the night you (& the rest of the campsite) will hear this woman ROAR!
PS - prior to this we've never had anything stolen from our campsite in our nearly 3 years on the road, and as you can see we're not real great at locking things up (our fridge box is very secure if we actually lock it. We just never do) so I think you could definitely call this an isolated event.
The only things we've lost to thieves this entire trip was a beach towel & my sisters cigarettes from the back deck of an apartment we stayed in. And some underwear off the line from a caravan park in QLD (only the white undies. The black ones were left on the line. Creep!!)
And as Ryan said on this occasion - "But Mum he must have just been thirsty and needed a beer, and had none of his own."
Yep kid, that's probably exactly it. Poor fellow, perhaps I shouldn't have been so hard on him 🤣